Parties

The end of July brought Meri’s 22nd birthday, which meant a party. Said party also was a joint going away party for Nolan and Brett, as they were moving to California something like a week and a half later.

Now, at the time (though to an extent still today), Nolan and Brett were still acting like everything was okay, like I wasn’t upset, and even maybe like I had no reason to be upset. I was (and still am) firm in my decision that limited contact with them was best for me for many reasons. I was (and still am) tired of being treated like shit, regardless of whether or not they or anyone else thought I deserved it, and I refused to send the message that doing so was okay. I still think they expected me to say, “Oh, man, you guys, you’re right. I was a huge bitch. Sorry!”

Marion, at least, seemed to understand this and texted me to say that even though she knew things had been awkward, she hoped I would go. I’d RSVPd to the Facebook with a “maybe” for a few reasons–one, I wasn’t sure if I even wanted to go, and I think she knew that. The other reason was practicality. I had just started working the 7-3 shift and was still living in Pittsburgh. My wake-up was 5:30. My bedtime was about 9:30. I would’ve had to leave the party around 8:30 to ensure I got home on time so I could be in bed on time. The party started at 7. Nothing fun happens at parties that early and few people are there then (a lot of people I wanted to see, including Marion, were there past my bedtime).

I didn’t decide whether or not to go until I left, more or less. I figured I’d make a quick appearance and give Meri her gift–nail polish and Betsey Johnson sunglasses, which she loved (flowered aviators).

I barely spoke to Nolan and Brett. Bitch move? Sure. But I was hurt by a deliberate action they seem to expect me to have been okay with. Hey, at least I’m an honest about my feelings.

And basically nothing happened until a week or so ago when Brett texted me because he assumed I was passively-aggressively Tweeting about him. He said my “blatant disregard for Nolan” affects him, which is fair. He has every right to be angry. But what about Nolan’s blatant disregard for me and basically everyone else? A big problem that’s played a role in all of this is how Nolan (as well as others) does what he wants when he wants to who he wants with seemingly little to no thought for feelings. He criticized me for not saying or doing anything to/with either of them prior to their moving, but phones and messaging work two ways. If contacting me mattered that much to them before they left, they could’ve done it, too. At this point (especially since Brett since asked me to leave them alone and I explained I have been trying to do just that since May), we’re clearly not interested in speaking to each other.

A lot of other things were said on both sides, many of which deserve their own posts if only for the hypocrisy, accusations, and assumptions. Basically, this whole thing started because of year-old grudges and assumptions over things that were said, and in one case, something I’m not convinced actually was said.

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