It’s Blow Off Janelle Week!

One of the things that really annoys me about job hunting is that as a candidate, you have to be perfect and completely honest. And I get that. But it seems employers can break the rules. The first time I felt less than thrilled with a potential new employer, the ad listed one work schedule and the actual interviewer told me a completely different one. I’ll grant that this can be blamed on discrepancies and miscommunication between HR and the actual department in need, but it still looks bad. Plus I’m skeptical that HR puts what they feel they need to in an ad to attract a candidate. We’re all selling ourselves here. I mean, yeah, candidates are trying to prove they’re right for the job, but in some ways, the employer needs to show they’re the right job for a candidate.

But it’s another thing to just be unreliable.

I saw an ad from a local magazine a few weeks ago looking for freelancers. I applied and never heard I thing, so I assumed, like ya do, they weren’t interested. In an uplifting turn of events, I was wrong–it just took a long time to go through all the resumes and writing samples. Fair enough. The editor asked what my schedule looked like so we could do a phone interview, I told him, and then more silence. So I followed up, and he seemed glad that I did and asked if he could call me later that day. I was literally walking into the theater to see Deadpool, but I shot off a quick e-mail telling him I had an open span of a few hours in the evening. I had to head off at 7 for an online reuniting of the writers group.

So I’m carting my phone around my apartment to make sure I know when it rings, and the timespan I gave him comes and goes. I even tell my writing group that in case he calls, I’ll have to duck out, but he never does. Which is kind of okay because writing group is much more pleasant, opportunities aside.

The editor e-mailed me overnight apologizing and asking if he could call the next day, and I said sure. But I was skeptical. I mean, you can kind of tell when something’s just not going to happen, you know? I honestly don’t think it was a matter of changing his mind about wanting to hire me, I just think he was kind of careless and unprofessional. I’d even give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he was just really busy.

But I was right–the following evening came and went and no call. As of this writing, I haven’t heard from him at all, not even an e-mail, but I’m kind of okay with that. Because I’m not really interested in working for someone who’s that unreliable.

In the meantime, I’ve been very, very slowly planning a wedding. And I’ve learned that one of the reasons I hate planning a wedding is because so much depends on other people, and I don’t even mean in the bridezilla sense that everything must be perfect–I mean even just touring venues hinges on people getting back to me and actually taking me on a tour.

Shortly after Paul and I got engaged, my mom forwarded me a venue a coworker recommended and initially, I wasn’t too crazy about it, but I saved it anyway because, you know, options. And when we did start planning, we started with venues. Paul initially ruled out Pittsburgh ones, which is a separate post and has since changed, and I really wanted something with some sort of overnight accommodations, which I’ll probably end up compromising on, but we’ll probably come to that next week. I sent some e-mails and got some pricing information, and we headed out one night to check out a resort that I personally really liked but Paul wasn’t sold on, in part because of the price. So since the other venue is in the mountains and I want something sort of out in nature, we decided to give them a shot. And they were a pain in my ass from then until this past Tuesday, when I scrapped them from the running.

Honestly, our scheduling is hard. We both work, of course, and then Paul has tai chi classes Monday and Wednesday nights and Saturday mornings, plus he goes out and plays Magic the Gathering on Tuesday nights, plus he sees a therapist once a week–not to mention whatever else we might have going on in a given week, which sometimes includes my own therapy appointments. Our one guaranteed free night is Thursday, especially if we’re driving over an hour away to tour a potential wedding venue. Because that kills your whole evening. The one advantage to the switch to Pittsburgh possibilities is it’s much easier for us to get there and back without spending a whole evening doing it, but like I said, story for another day. Given work and travel time, the earliest we could get to said venue was 5. I understand this is starting to fall into the realm of after-hours, but the resort we looked at accommodated that just fine. Another hotel we’d considered was pretty upfront that because of their mountain location, they’re closed for the season and don’t even have power, so evening tours straight up don’t work. And I get that. If we could figure out a way to easily take off from work to go or even if I was willing to wait until they reopen–and I’m not, which we’ll get to–we’d go look at it, but it’s just not easy to work with right now.

Earlier this month, I narrowed down the first free evening we had, which was the 18, and scheduled a tour with this other venue. Like I said, I understand if a tour at 5 isn’t feasible, but they said it was fine. So I’m eating a catered lunch on the 18 when my phone buzzes with an e-mail from the venue asking if we could be there at 4 instead, and man, I just knew how this was gonna end. I sent a quick reply explaining that with our work and travel time 5 was the best I could do. Seriously. I mean, at most, I could’ve pushed up the appointment by a whopping 15 minutes, and that would hinge on Paul getting home from work on time and us leaving immediately. We were actually late for our resort showing because that didn’t happen.

A couple hours later, they said what I was expecting to hear–they had to cancel. They said they’d had a last-minute reservation. I was skeptical but chose to believe them, and we rescheduled. They asked again if we could do 4. Nope. By now, I was getting annoyed. I’d already explained why I couldn’t, not to mention I didn’t really understand why it was such a hassle for them to wait the extra hour.

I had to reschedule for two days later because Paul and I both forgot he had a counseling appointment, but no big deal–we figured it out within a few hours of the initial reschedule and made the change. But the venue must’ve forgot, because the day of the original reschedule, this past Tuesday, I get another e-mail canceling and saying to let them know if we could make it at 4 because they just couldn’t do 5.

And now I’m pissed.

First of all, I’m questioning that initial “last-minute reservation” at all, because frankly, it looks a hell of a lot more like someone just doesn’t want to stay at work past 5. And really, if someone would’ve said from the start, “Sorry, we can’t take you that late,” I would’ve understood. Hell, maybe Paul and I could’ve each taken a day off from work and tackled two hard-to-tour venues in one day. But instead, they canceled on me twice, day-of, after I’d scheduled my overtime hours around these appointments. Twice.

And as a result, I’ve lost probably a month of wedding-planning time, by the time all is said and done.

See, we got engaged New Year’s Day. After all the announcements were made, I wanted to have a week or so to just, you know, enjoy the engagement before we started wedding planning, but I didn’t want to wait too long. I knew I wanted a summer wedding for the warm weather, and I didn’t want to rush it into this summer, which already has two, maybe three weddings in it anyway (a cousin, my brother, and possibly Paul’s brother). So I’m aiming for summer 2017, and I figured if we got started by January of February of this year, we would have plenty of time to get things booked, save more money, and get everything taken care of. So the plan was that after our original scheduled appointment on the 18, a Thursday, we’d decide which venue we wanted over the weekend so one of us could call and officially book it the following Monday and get shit moving.

When that got pushed back a week, I got a little antsy. There’s very little planning I can do until I get a venue. So I thought I might as well check out other venues since I had to wait anyway, plus Paul wasn’t sure about the resort and I had a feeling we were gonna get canceled on again. Shit, I even said, “If they cancel a second time, we’re moving on.”

The good news is I did find another place that’s the current frontrunner, we just have to go see it next weekend. Damn that pesky scheduling thing. But I could’ve found this place, called, and probably even toured it and shit, maybe even booked it by now had someone just told me from my first e-mail that 5 p.m. didn’t work for them. I mean, by the time I go see this other place, it’ll have been almost a month since I scheduled the first tour. I have lost a month of planning time because someone couldn’t just be honest about their scheduling abilities.

What a pain in my ass.

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