Friday night, we stopped by my parents’ house, grabbing dinner at Fiesta Azteca on our way in. Mostly, I needed to squeeze in a time to finish up our taxes with my accountant mother, plus pick up doggy stairs she wasn’t using anymore to give to Terra, but we hung around for a bit, played with the dog, and had a chill evening. My dad’s doing well–definitely feeling better than he was last weekend, days post-chemo.

Saturday night, we met up with Katie and Jacob and cousin Chelsea for Emily’s show at school. Typically, they stick to plays–that’s all Paul and I have seen her in since she started college–but once every four years, they do a musical, and this year, sticking with a monster theme of the school year’s previous shows, they did Young Frankenstein.

And it was great. Paul and I have seen the musical before and knew it was a good time, but Katie said it’s probably her favorite musical now. I mean, you can’t really go wrong with Mel Brooks’ humor.

We went to Primanti’s for dinner after and had some drinks and good conversation before, as always, heading our separate ways and vowing to do it again soon.

And Sunday night, it was off to the movies with Terra and Jon to see Pet Sematary. Paul wasn’t crazy about going, not being a horror fan. He was also outnumbered, and if you’d paid attention to all four of us during the movie, you would’ve been able to tell which of us were horror fans. I cracked the occasional joke, Terra laughed, and the two of us plus Jon never really reacted to anything except children getting hit by trucks. Paul, on the other hand, spent much of the second half either closing his eyes or covering his ears or both.

The three of us also being the ones who had bother read the book and seen the first movie, we really liked it. We all found it to be an improvement over the original movie but still not as good as the book, and I’m debating exploring some of this in a separate post. I love that book and there’s so much good stuff in it that was cut out of both movies. I would love to see a faithful adaptation. I guess I would say one of my biggest complaints, though, is unnecessary jump scares early on. There’s not a whole hell of a lot of scary stuff in the beginning, and I get the sense that they threw in a few jump scares just for the sake of it because they felt like they couldn’t do nothing. And I guess that’s the problem with a lot of current horror–there’s an impulse to be constantly getting a reaction out of the audience, even when with source material like Pet Sematary, it’s more of a slow burn, and a really effective one at that. Now I’m rambling.

At that point, Terra and Jon had been gone all day, while Paul and I had only left the house for the first time. So they headed home to tend to the pets while Paul and I went for a late dinner at Bahama Breeze, because I love a gimmicky chain restaurant where I can eat pineapple and coconut on almost anything.

And now it’s back to the work week. Record Store Day is this weekend, so I’m trying to decide whether to go to Pittsburgh or Greensburg. I feel like the Pittsburgh stores are more likely to have the releases I want while the Greensburg stores are less likely to be crowded.

We always say we’re wanting to go to brunch when Tina’s serving up at Black Forge, but it seems the brunch schedule and our schedules never mesh. But at last, last Saturday, we had a free morning, so we went up for some coffee and a delicious sampling of quiches. And then we stopped at the mall on the way home because, I mean, might as well if it’s right there.

Paul’s co-workers are big fans of doing escape rooms and one of the nearby libraries set one up for free, so in the evening, we went to do that and ended up being the fastest team, escaping with 10 minutes left on a 30-minute time limit. As a result, we got put in for a drawing for prizes, and Paul’s name was drawn for a Starbucks gift card. Nice to go do something and get money for it instead of having to pay for it, plus that library was pretty nice. I know my brother visits that one a good bit and our library is connected to it and others in the county, I’ve just never stopped in.

And afterwards, a few of us went out to Mad Mex, because Paul and I can’t be within 15 minutes of the place and not go. It’s just so good.

Our favorite movie theater, Row House, was doing a sci-fi, memory-focused theme for the week, and they were showing Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and Blade Runner. As much as I would love to see Eternal Sunshine in a theater, I’ve already shown it to Paul–but he’d never seen Blade Runner. And if we’re gonna go, I’d rather go see something at least one of us hasn’t seen before. It’s part of what I love about Row House. It makes movies you have seen a little more fun, but because it exclusively shows older releases surrounding a different theme every week, you get a chance to see something that’s long left theaters on a big screen in surround sound.

Of the two movies, I think I enjoy Eternal Sunshine more, but as far as seeing something in a theater, Blade Runner was the right choice. I’d forgotten how beautiful its cinematography is, and when the movie started with those awesome, ridiculous noir-esque shots of what they thought of as a futuristic LA, I was really happy Paul’s first exposure to the film wasn’t on one of our laptops in our bed. Hilariously, the movie is set in 2019, and when that title flashed on screen, I laughed out loud. But also…Sean Young. That is all.

Wait, one final thing–approximately everyone out-acts Harrison Ford in that movie.

We seem to only do this when we go to Lawrenceville, maybe because it’s super easy to do it, but we make it a point to never eat at the same restaurant twice. We just kind of had the idea and stuck to it, I think because the first time we decided to eat in the area, we decided to just walk until we found something interesting, and in the process, we just saw how many neat restaurants there are. So we try something new every time, and usually, we choose just based on walking until we hit something we’ve never been to. It was a Sunday evening, so a few places were closing up, which made taco place Condado the winner.

Condado is essentially build-your-own tacos. They have a menu of suggestions to choose from, sure, but you can also just fill out what you want–basically the same concept as Burgatory, just with tacos. We opted for some of the suggestions, and I took it easy because both vegetarian options sounded spicy, and I went for the one that sounded less likely to destroy my tastebuds. I ended up being wrong, but that aside, it was a great taco. It also introduced me to jackfruit, which is apparently a pretty good meat substitute due to its texture and the fact that it takes on other flavors similar to the way tofu does.

So basically, despite eating a taco that was a little too much for me, I loved the place. Paul did, too, and it may put a wrench in our plans to just wander Lawrenceville for food.

We made our annual trip to the zoo two weeks ago, which I enjoyed as much as I always do, and then we had lunch/dinner at Burgatory. It was a nice, fun day out with the family.

We didn’t do much for the 4th, at least not what one would expect. One day, we’ll host our own cookouts, but for now, with nothing else going on–and partly because I wanted to anyway–we went out to Row House for a screening of Pan’s Labyrinth. I watch it every couple years, it seems, which is about good. As good as it is, it can also be depressing and intense, so it’s not something you want to be watching frequently. But it’s one of the many movies I’ve been wanting to show Paul, so when it popped up in a fantasy theme at Row House, that was my opportunity. And that’s what I love about the fact that Row House shows older movies. You get the theater experience with movies that have long left them. I saw Pan’s Labyrinth when it first came out in theaters, so I’m glad Paul got that.

The movie was great, of course, and I cried at the end, which has happened every time I’ve seen it. I’m not sure about the first time, but the last time I watched it, it was late, I was up watching it alone, and I had a good sob session. Maybe it’s the fact that I’ve seen it  enough times now, but I did a good job of not being a total mess leaving the theater.

We walked down the road a bit and found some dinner, spent the evening walking a trail near our apartment, and that was our 4th. It was kind of nice.

It should be weird that my youngest cousin is graduating from high school and is off to college, but it’s not. And that’s kind of weird in itself.

Her graduation party was Saturday, so we spent a sunny afternoon with the relatives and watching my family play cornhole. The real winner there was me, who acknowledges I’m terrible at cornhole, refuses to give in to the peer pressure, and has more fun socializing instead.

We were set to go watch the Pens game at my parents’ house in the evening, so since we were gonna be in the area, we decided to make a trip to visit Paul’s family, too–mostly the new cat, Link, who was a good time. Strangely, although I’ve often been critical of how they used to treat their dog before it died, I think a cat could be really good for them. They’re more independent and easier to take care of, which I think is what they need.

Unfortunately, back at my parents’ place later, the Pens lost. The series is now tied.

On Sunday, we finally saw Get Out–Row House was doing a Creepy Communities theme, so even though I thought we missed it in theaters, we got a second chance. I was kinda sorta but not really spoiled, unfortunately, thanks to a headline about similar themes, but at least it wasn’t a full spoiler. But while it didn’t spoil the plot itself, it did spoil the experience, which is almost as bad. Because I had an idea of what direction things were going, I kept thinking about that and trying to see how things fit in with it, rather than just enjoying it and watching things unfold, which was kind of frustrating. But we really liked it and thought it was really well-done.

So, here’s the thing. In December, I signed up to write all of AXS’s New Year’s concert previews. Not too long after I finished those, an editor asked me to take on all of AXS’s Valentine’s Day concert previews. Not too long after I finished those, I volunteered to help tackle some of the St. Patrick’s Day because I’m an idiot, I guess. I mean, I’ll probably change my attitude once I get paid–all the Valentine’s Day ones should hit, well, today, followed by St. Patrick’s Day next month–but what ended up happening every time was I had less writing time than I expected and ended up coming home from working full-time and spending entire evenings for days, in some cases over week, finishing the things. It wasn’t even that it was difficult work, it was just that some cities don’t have as much going on as others, so hunting down, say, five family-friendly St. Patrick’s Day events can take a long time.

I keep saying when I finish up that I’m taking a writing break for a week, but at this point, not even I believe me when I say that. I’m just grateful that the only possible holiday they could throw at me next is Earth Day, and I don’t think that’s a thing an event site cares enough about.

In the midst of all this, Terra started working at a crisis call center and wanted to spend one of her nights off seeing a movie, so I ditched an evening I should’ve spent writing to hang out with her and her new beau, this guy she’s been friends with for a little while that I always kind of thought had a thing for her. Well, with her husband turning into a colossal shit, one thing led to another, and bam, we go on double dates now.

Look, here’s the thing: it’s super easy to start comparing someone’s ex to their new significant other, and on top of that, hindsight is 20/20, as they say. I never had a problem with her husband–we actually got along pretty well–but this new guy, whose name is also Scott, just seems…so much better. He’s a good few years younger than us, meaning myself, Terra, and Paul, so there are some things that come along with that difference in age, but that’s been our only real complaint. He’s easier to talk to, he’s more friendly, he’s more compassionate, and so on. Her husband had this impatience and harshness to him, even pre-Navy, that this guy just doesn’t. He’s more fun to hang out with, and he seems to just be better for her, too.

So we met up in the South Hills. I made a pit stop to unload a stack of old magazines at Half Price Books and got like a whole two bucks for them, but hey, I’ll take it–better than the stack taking up much-needed space in my apartment, especially considering I never read almost all of them. I don’t even know how I got them, either, aside from Rolling Stone, which I know comes with certain Live Nation ticket orders. But I don’t know how I ended up with Better Housekeeping and Ebony. I have an unsubstantiated theory that it has to do with my FYE membership.

We grabbed a quick food-court dinner since car trouble had Scott and Terra running late. Now, I’ve never had to worry about a movie selling out pretty much ever, yet sure enough, when we went back to the theater, Split was sold out. After doing some Googling, we figured if we left fast, we could make it back to Washington for the next showing there, and we just barely made it–it was close to selling out, and we ended up not being able to sit together.

I guess the crowds were on to something. The reviews I read before going in were all positive, and honestly, I’ve really been rooting for M. Night Shyamalan to make a comeback. I really liked his early films–I’m even a rare fan of Lady in the Water, or at least I think it has more merit than people give it credit for–and after movies like The Village and The Happening, where the quality really started tanking, I felt he needed to take a break and get back to more basic storytelling that didn’t focus so much on a twist. I knew, and I think a lot of other fans and general moviegoers knew, too, that he was capable of much better, and I really hoped he’d come back with something good and not just kind of disappear. And I think he’s done it with Split. It has received some valid criticism, but it was entertaining to watch, appropriately disturbing, and just delivered a good trip to the movies. I was so happy for Shyamalan when I left that theater because he finally got one right. It’s got to feel good to have your movies go from being panned to get genuinely good reviews and ending up #1.

On another Shyamalan note, I also Netflixed the Avatar: The Last Airbender not too long before we went. Now, I hear that the problems with that movie have less to do with Shyamalan himself and more to do with the script and studio, which I totally believe, but that, too, was bad. It kind of stripped the show of everything that made it good and paired it with a whitewashed cast–with the exception of the villains, who were of course still brown, because Hollywood–and bad acting. The exception was Dev Patel. Good for you, Dev Patel.


The day after Christmas, I did the unthinkable–I went to the gym.

I’ve always been kind of anti-gym, just really feeling like it wasn’t for me and I hated it and didn’t see the need for it. And for a while, that was all true. But while Paul and I were in a good walking routine while it was warm, it’s not something we can really keep up now that we’re in the middle of winter, and if I want to lose weight, that’s not gonna cut it–especially as I’m closer to 30 than I am 20. So I decided it was time to do a little more. Paul had been going to the gym and lifting weights every so often with a friend of his, so I decided to tag along.

And so the boys put me through a weightlifting regimen, obviously with a pitiful amount of weight because, you know, I’ve never actually done this before and have no muscle to me at all. But I trusted them, and I held my own–I may have done a tiny fraction of what they did in terms of weight, but I did nearly everything they did until about the end, when I really just couldn’t anymore. But I was pleased with and proud of myself for having done it, and I was happy to find that I didn’t hate it. Maybe it’s that I’m older now and my opinions on it are different than when I was scrawny, maybe it was just the better attitude in general, I don’t know, but I actually kind of enjoyed it and was looking forward to continuing to go, most likely on weekends with Paul and Marc.

We went home, got cleaned up, headed to the South Hills to buy books at Half Price Books that I’d wanted for Christmas and hadn’t gotten, then went on our annual trip to see The Nutcracker, the only day we were able to squeeze it in. Usually, Brandon and Kelly join us, but they saw it down in Morgantown since one of Kelly’s friends (and bridesmaids) had a lead role this year. So it was just Paul and I, out on the town on our day off.

The next day brought the annual Trans-Siberian Orchestra concert, too, and I lucked out and got the day after that off–I had one floating holiday left to use by the end of the year and the schedule was full, but I took my chances and requested it anyway. I figured I’d lose the day entirely if I didn’t bother and that it didn’t hurt to try, and it paid off.

Paul’s college roommate happened to be in town from California, where he’s still in the Air Force, so we met up with him for dinner and a movie. We saw Assassin’s Creed, which did make for an entertaining movie but still felt very much like a video-game movie in that it just kind of felt underdeveloped, like the characters and plot could’ve used a little more depth.

Paul and I went out again for dinner the next night, and then I started feeling a little pain in the back of my throat. It wasn’t too bad, but I decided the smart thing to do was take a day and call off. I felt a little bad calling off in a week where I’d already had one day off for a holiday and a second day off for vacation time, but I’ve learned by now that it’s better to take a day early on and recover rather than push myself and feel worse as a result. And I figured it was the weekend of New Year’s, so I’d have a nice, long weekend to get over whatever little bug I’d come down with.

I was wrong.

Friday 5: Celluloid Heroes


  1. What movie most recently impressed you with its score or soundtrack? Deadpool. I know everyone talks about that soundtrack anyway, but whoever was in charge really deserves credit for the delightful use of Juice Newton’s “Angel of the Morning.”
  2. What movie most recently impressed you with its costumes or makeup? The only thing coming to mind is The Danish Girl, but I hesitate to say that because I know of, understand, and agree with the criticism over casting Eddie Redmayne instead of a transgender actress, and it just doesn’t feel quite right to praise it for its costumes and makeup as a result. I have some other thoughts on this that I’m having trouble articulating, to be honest, but they involve praising people for putting makeup on a cisgendered man as opposed to casting a transgender woman.
  3. What movie most recently impressed you with its scenic backdrops? The Revenant. It had some great shots of the setting and scenery.
  4. What movie most recently impressed you with its originality? We recently Netflix’d Rear Window, a Hitchcock film in which a man recovering from a broken leg is spending his time looking out his window and creeping on his neighbors and comes to suspect one such neighbor murdered his wife. It surprised us with how unpredictable we found it–we’ve both seen lots of movies and read lots of books and sometimes have a really easy time of predicting what will happen or where something is going. Consult our somewhat ill-fated Prometheus screening as an example. But we weren’t sure of how things were gonna go, which was nice on its own but also because it’s an older movie and you’d think we’d be able to see right through it. Not to mention the fact that it inspired plenty of remakes and copycats, so you know it was on to something.
  5. What movie most recently impressed you with its dialogue? Rear Window wins this one, too. This ties into characterization, as well, but with the two Hitchcock movies I’ve seen–this and Psycho–I’ve noticed a pattern of not sugarcoating people and their words or actions. The genre helps, too, but there doesn’t seem to be this tendency to have people always being polite. In particular, we liked how sort of rough the character of the nurse was and how they came through in her lines, but we did feel like everyone spoke in a very realistic way.

I made a stop over at my parents’ house again last Wednesday after a super fun gynecologist visit to once again take advantage of free laundry. I’ve been around there a lot lately mostly out of necessity, and as much as I don’t like making the hour-long drive, it has been nice to wash large loads of clothes for free or tackle towels and bedding without having to spend $4 to do it.

My mom was heading out drinking with her coworkers for the evening and invited me out with them, so I headed over and had some dinner and drinks with them. I’ve always enjoyed my mom’s coworkers, even when I was a teenager. They’re fun, and I don’t feel like I’m hanging out with people nearly twice my age.

On Thursday, Paul and I ventured out again to Row House Cinema in Pittsburgh, a little movie theater known for doing screenings of older movies that I’ve always wanted to check out. I usually pass on going because a lot tend to be on Thursday nights, and with Paul and I both working at 7 in the morning, we don’t like being out late–and late for us is past 9:30, our bedtime. But a former coworker he really liked, Ian, had two extra tickets to a screening of Nosferatu, with a Nosferatu beer included with admission. Paul’s been wanting to hang out with Ian since their project got scrapped and half the department got let go, and I’ve been wanting to watch Nosferatu, so it was a win-win.

Row House Cinema, first of all, is really cool. I see why so many people like it. It’s small, but it’s nice and has beer and great movie selections, like a whole Halloween series in October and V for Vendetta all day on Nov. 5. There were a lot of ads for upcoming screenings I’d really like to go to. I wish I would’ve gone sooner, and I’m definitely gonna have to suck it up in the future and go out on a work night, because it’s worth it. Besides, might as well while I can, when I’m young and childfree.

As for the movie itself, I really enjoyed it. My Netflix list has been totally out of control basically since I first got Netflix, and while I try to watch classic movies, there’s just so much out there and I have so many other things I want to do, not to mention obligations and things, that it’s tough to get to. I wish I could say I’d seen a full-length silent film before this, but alas, I had not. It’s not like I was expecting to dislike the format, but it held my attention much better than I thought it would. And in fact, some things impressed me–the picture had been restored, yeah, but I was still surprised by how crisp and clear it looked.

Nosferatu wasn’t a perfect movie–mostly, the pacing started to get a little odd as it got closer to the end–but it doesn’t feel fair to judge it too harshly when the medium was still so new. It also got a lot of laughs despite being early horror, but I’d say it was less because it was genuinely funny and more because it was a little campy, partly because of the silent format and the fact that so much is being done visually out of necessity. Facial expressions in particular were pretty entertaining, as they were often really exaggerated. I laughed at the absurdity of some things, like Nosferatu carrying a coffin through town in the middle of the day without a single person wondering what the fuck this creepy dude was doing carrying a coffin through town in the middle of the day. Or even just the general creepiness of Nosferatu just, you know, being himself.

That said, though, as funny as he was in some ways, he’s also still pretty creepy. I mean, he still looks creepy, for one, after all that makeup and special effects have brought to horror movies in the years since, and he certainly acts creepy. The story may be incredibly familiar and almost a trope now, but there’s still something that gets you about this guy creeping around a castle and eventually creeping around a town, staring across the street at the protagonist’s wife. It’s uncomfortable, even if you chuckle while it’s happening.

And of course, as a lifelong lover of horror movies, I was really glad to see such an iconic one. I quite enjoyed it, and I’d like to rewatch it one of these days now that I know what to expect. Sometimes, at least for me, movies are almost better enjoyed a second time around, when you have no expectations and can watch things unfold in a more relaxed manner.

It aged well, really. I mean, I don’t think audiences today find it very scary–except maybe for people who don’t watch much horror or scare easily–but it’s still entertaining.

I think what struck me most of all, though, was just the idea that a movie that’s nearly 100 years old is still considered a classic and hasn’t lost much of it’s luster, to the point that in 2016, it’s still being shown for Halloween and just about sold out–and with a beer named after it, too. It made me wonder what the filmmakers and cast expected when they did it and whether or not they thought it would even last this long, let alone still appeal to audiences. I think it’s something almost all artists now hope to achieve, at least on some level, but I’m not sure it’s something people thought about at the time.

So even though we got in late, Paul and I were both glad we went, and Ian seemed glad, too. We’re determined to try to do it again sometime, and I won’t lie, I’m kind of hoping Ian and his girlfriend become closer friends of ours.

Movie Review: Deadpool

Apparently, Deadpool broke some box-office records and shattered studio expectations. Personally, I take this as proof the studios aren’t as in touch with their audiences as they think they are.

In some ways, Deadpool is a pretty typical superhero story, what with a human being turned sort of superhuman and all. Wade Wilson works as a mercenary–not-so-typical–lives with his longtime girlfriend, and he’s diagnosed with late-stage cancer. He gets a mysterious offer from a man representing a group claiming they can cure him, with a few other bonuses, and he takes them up on it. But that’s where things divert a bit and the “typical superhero story” ends. The group puts its subjects under intense stress and pain in order to trigger mutant genes that’ll then kick in and do things like take care of Wade’s cancer and various other perks. In Wade’s case, he can also heal, and he’s also unfortunately disfigured. The head of the group, who is named Francis but calls himself Ajax, tells Wilson, who later takes the name Deadpool, that he’s able to fix this, but he ultimately leaves Wilson for dead in a fire engulfing their building. Oh, and the group actually takes its mutants and sells them to people to do with them as they please.

And so rather than being about superheroes trying to save the world, Deadpool is about a man who essentially was misled into a shit arrangement, ends up disfigured, and wants revenge–especially when Francis kidnaps his girlfriend. Yet it has much of what’s become typical and beloved about superhero movies, from tons of ass-kicking and action scenes to a healthy but not overdone dose of romance. Aside from some more atypical storylines, Deadpool also differs in its tone. It’s packed with dark, raunchy humor and a self-awareness that pokes at its genre just enough to make it funny for said genre’s fans without coming off as though those fans are the butt of the joke.

Honestly, I was pretty sold just in the opening sequence–we open with Juice Newton’s “Angel of the Morning,” and because I recognized the song, I laughed immediately. It plays over a beautifully constructed freeze-frame of Deadpool mid-fight with some of Francis’ henchman, while mock credits roll saying things like “some douche’s movie” starring “a hot chick” (Morena Baccarin, who Firefly fans will recognize as Inara and probably love here). Leading up to us going to see it, my fiancé would say things like, “I hope they didn’t just put all the funniest jokes in the trailers,” and although strangely, those jokes got the biggest laughs in our theater, they weren’t the best parts of the movie. In retrospect, the trailers do just what a good trailer should, and that is give you a really good idea of what you’re in for without telling you everything.

My only real complaint is the use of the flashback structure, just because I’m not a fan of it and the film could’ve easily been just as well-paced and good had it been told in a more traditional chronological narrative. But in the end, that’s just a minor complaint and a matter of taste more than anything.

So if you like dark, irreverent humor and superhero movies, you’re gonna like Deadpool. It’s a good time.

Movie Review: The Revenant

Warning: there are some spoilers here, so proceed with caution. I tried not to give away anything huge, but I do discuss the ending!

The plot of The Revenant might be as simple as it gets–after a man serving as a guide gets attacked by a bear, a few of the men he’s with and his son stay behind. And one of those men murders his son in front of him while he’s helpless to do anything, including speak, then leaves him for dead.

But I think the simplicity is what makes The Revenant work so well–in a lot of ways, it’s basically a survival story, and for as simple as it is, it’s actually really unpredictable. You don’t know how Leonardo DiCaprio’s character is going to get himself out of the various situations he gets into, or if he will at all. You don’t know where he’s going to end up, how he’s going to get there, and what he’s going to do. And that’s probably my favorite part about the film as a whole. It can be really hard to keep audiences guessing, especially ones who read a lot of books and watch a lot of movies and TV. When you’ve either read or seen it all, you’re almost never surprised, and maybe that’s why The Revenant excels in its simplicity. It also proves that “simple” doesn’t necessarily mean “predictable.”

It’s also a film with a lot of emotion, and it’s very much a revenge film–and that’s probably then only predictable thing about it. Because of course a man who witnesses his son’s murder is gonna want to go after the man who did it. But that motivation isn’t necessarily obvious from the start. Initially, DiCaprio’s will to live seems to stem from, well, being human, but as we see him go along, it becomes abundantly clear he doesn’t care about survival so much as he does getting even. We see him scribbling things in rocks and in snow, and it’s not until later in the film that we see he’s writing, “Fitzgerald killed my son.” I took this as a twofold message. One, he wants to live to go back and make Fitzgerald pay. Two, if he doesn’t, he’s put what happened in writing, and if someone from his original party sees it, they’ll know.

And naturally, all this means it’s a pretty emotionally raw film, too, packed with intensity and grit. It’s graphic, but not excessively or distractingly so–while I complained before about Tarantino’s Hateful Eight feeling gratuitous, The Revenant instead feel realistic. I was cringing because I could imagine how painful it would be to, say, pack a hole in your neck full of gunpowder then ignite it to cauterize the wound.

The acting was all excellent, too, and as amazing as DiCaprio was throughout, some of the best moments were when the group realizes he’s alive and naturally is not too pleased to learn what happened, leading up to a huntdown of Fitzgerald.

The ending seems to be open to interpretation, which I also loved but know some people really hate. Personally? I think DiCaprio died.